Had a satisfying day at work today.
All my patients woke up nicely, clear headed, comfortable and not sick. This feeling of accomplishment lasted until I was driving out of my workplace to begin my commute home. I took an admittedly perfunctory look to left and right before beginning to nose out into the traffic, but when I looked to my right again I saw an elderly woman on a mobility scooter on the footpath looking quite cross, and shaking her head. Abashed, I reversed back up the driveway to allow her to cross. The pedestrian on the other side gave me a cheery wave, but the grumpy lady was not to be appeased. As she trundled across in front of the Tesla, she pointed up at the stop sign, which she clearly felt I hadn’t paid sufficient attention to. She merely sniffed at my apologetic grimace and wave. That brought me back down to earth.
I’ve been really struggling with my self worth lately. Being told off for my editorial was more of a gut punch than I probably appreciated at the time. I used to get a lot of positive feedback for my little essays. I was a bit cheeky at times, but no one had ever accused me of malice before.
Closer to home, and even more painfully, a family member is so upset with me that they aren’t speaking to me. I don’t even know what it’s about. But just imagine being the toxic person that your friends always warned you to steer clear of. I’ve never been the bad guy before. I probably shouldn’t be writing about it here, but honestly, it’s hard to imagine our relationship getting any worse than this. What is worse than no interaction at all? It really hurts.
At times like this, I think rather wistfully of my friend who is a cat lady living alone in a big house in Cypress. Maybe she’s got the right idea after all.