Old scheduling email 13 October 2017

It feels like time to go through the archives again.

From: Kirsty Jordan
Sent: Friday, 13 October 2017 2:24 p.m.
To: Wellington Anaesthesia All Staff
Subject: What’s it all about?

Big election scandal this week. Some anarchist hacked their way onto the Forest and Bird “Bird of the Year” election website and voted over a hundred times for the white faced heron. Even with this boost, the poor heron is still miles behind the front runner, which this year is the Kea. Boring! I’ve had a beef against these little miscreants ever since they removed all the rubber from my car windows and dug holes out of my bumpers many years ago during a day trip to Fox glacier. (At least we were better off than the poor guy who had his entire bicycle seat eaten. That would have been an uncomfortable ride home!) I voted for the Kereru.  What’s not to love about these gormless fat pigeons that regularly get drunk on berries and fall out of trees? Fairly typical of much of our native wildlife, sadly – no wonder so many are endangered. They had it too good for too long.

National Anaesthesia Day on Monday. Many thanks to Leona, Jeremy and Ben for representing us to the general public, and warning of the dangers of growing old. I’ve been mulling lately about our role in patient outcomes. I was working with a visiting surgeon recently, who hails from a state known for it’s soft cheese as well as it’s courageous gay lawyers with AIDS. As he sliced into someone’s scalp recently, he was horrified to be sprayed with blood: “What’s the patient’s BP?” he barked “I’ve done hundreds of craniotomies, and never have I seen so much bleeding…” Well, excuse me, the patients BP is fine, you’re the one with the scalpel in your hand, did you try adding adrenaline to your local? have you heard of diathermy?? (The latter was all my internal dialogue, you have to understand – I was laughing too hard to say any of it out loud. He did look like an extra in some slasher horror movie.) I don’t know, am I old fashioned to want to perfuse the patient’s brain? A few days later, we worked together again. A patient I was very nervous about, with multiple chronic pain problems and severe lung disease.  At preassessment clinic and during her admission, the anaesthetic team worked hard to listen to all her concerns and work with her to optimize her analgesia, and we were feeling quite reasonably chuffed with ourselves when we went to see her in PACU and she was happy and grateful. I subsequently bumped into our surgeon in the corridor. “Our patient is looking great in recovery!” I said. “Thank You!” he said, visibly preening himself on his surgical skill which he obviously thought I had complimented him on. Maybe being a little deluded about your powers is an essential part of the surgical mindset?

Ps. Remember, kids, BBFE is not a joke! (Eds note – had to add this at the end to show that Blood and Body Fluid Exposure is an infection risk that we take seriously. Covering my ass.)

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