And here’s the next in the sequence, which technically means I’m on a roll.
From: Kirsty Jordan
Sent: Friday, 29 September 2017 1:13 PM
To: Wellington Anaesthesia All Staff
Subject: nothing about any controversial referendums
Hi All,
I’m hiding in my office again. This week it’s because I’m suffering the side effects of my second nose lasering treatment. The results were underwhelming last time so this time they’ve upped the ergs, and now my nose is swollen and glowing. There’s only so much concealer can do. I don’t know how people with port wine stains manage it? I suppose you get more skilled with practice. My daughters all shake their heads when they see my amateurish make up attempts. In spite of the luminous schnoz, we all enjoyed ourselves last night at “The Play That Went Wrong”, which I would highly recommend as a most amusing night out.
As you can see, I’ve just about recovered from the election last weekend. I’m going to leave the subject alone, although I did laugh to myself just quietly when I read this week that you can tell a psychopath by the music they like. A strong giveaway is a penchant for “Lose Yourself” by Eminem. Hmmm… wasn’t that the song the National Party got sued for borrowing during the last election? But I’m sure you can’t draw any conclusions from that.
Since the elections we’ve had daylight savings come in. we’ve even had a couple of warm sunny days this week. My grumpiness at having to get up an hour earlier is outweighed by the fact that all the clocks I own that I can’t figure out how to change the time on easily, are now actually reading correctly for the first time in six months.
I have been meaning to ask, does anyone else get phone calls put through by the hospital operators for completely different people? I’ve had several phone calls lately from people looking for the ortho reg (apparently #6884, as opposed to my number #6844). The hospital operator seemed to think I was overreacting to such a simple slip up, but it does lead to some awkward conversations (and sometimes quite late at night). I often have to interrupt quite long involved stories from various people, and when you say “who do you think you’re talking to?” they can take it quite the wrong way. Last week I even got a phone call from someone looking for the Wellington Free Ambulance. “I’m sorry sir, I appreciate you’ve got crushing central chest pain, I’d love to help, I really would, but unfortunately…”. They got the hint eventually.
The best news this week was the Saudi King saying that women are going to be allowed to drive, from next year. This is a great leap forward, which will hopefully help drag the country into the 19th century. I just hope they’ve got their car insurance sorted, so they don’t end up with nasty surprises such as I got this week. After my unfortunate bollard incident a couple of months ago, my premiums have gone up to an eye-watering 5% of the value of my car. Curse you, aggressive and anonymous recycling truck driver!
The week has ended up on a sad note with the death of Hugh Hefner. I had no idea he was 91 years old. It seems his diet of whisky, Viagra and bunnies had left him quite well preserved. I’m not particularly familiar with the Playboy magazine, which won’t shock you, but I understand the articles were quite good.
Monday
There is a big combined case in OT 2, with plastics and general surgery joining Barry in dealing with an unfortunate patient who has a rotten sternum. I think Barry is removing it; the general team are tracking the pus down into the abdomen; and the plastic surgeon is creating some sort of pec major flap to cover it all up again. The plastic surgeon’s main concern is how he is going to get into theatres without a swipe card, so I hope we can find someone to let him in. He does look a bit shifty, so perhaps his concern is warranted.
The penny has finally dropped for the respiratory physicians – that everything is easier with an anaesthetist around – and hence today they have requested one for an EBUS.
Thursday
Jeremy has organized a bronchoscopy course for this afternoon, and lots of RMOs are rostered off to it. I gave him every RMO he asked for, but since I sent out the schedule an hour ago he has changed his mind, and wants a smaller number. The unlucky ones will be seeded back into the schedule I guess? Anyway, that was the reason Linda and Indu were doubled up in acutes.
I wonder what part 2 teaching is? No one has complained that I’ve rostered them when I shouldn’t so either it’s being taken by someone who is unobservant, or else by someone from outside the department. Let’s hope the latter.
Friday
Extra neuro in OT 4. They wanted the afternoon in OT 6 as well, but luckily someone spotted it and we’ve taken it back as acutes.
Will is spending the day safely tucked away on the litho bus. They used to provide lunch when it was parked outside the private hospital, not sure if that still stands?
October already! Where does the time go? Hope you all have a lovely weekend.
Kirsty
Ps. Best wishes, Lucy! I will miss your animal husbandry tips, and your hair. You’re also quite a good tech.