Insight

I try to limit my time scrolling on Facebook, partly because it’s an addictive time waster, but mostly it makes me feel bad about myself.
It seems my life is a disappointment; it just doesn’t measure up to other peoples. But I think actually the game Wordle is a good example of what’s really going on here. I don’t play Wordle on principle. This is possibly self defeating, but it’s partly because I love language and I would hate to do badly at it. Nonetheless, it’s clear that people only post a result online when they’ve done well, guessing the word in a small number of turns. This is like when people post proud photos of their beautiful children graduating. And why not? That’s what Facebook is for. Similarly, no one posts photos of just another routine day or mildly disappointing life event, or when they do only OK on Wordle, or fail to work out the word at all. All this behaviour is perfectly reasonable but when I’m feeling blah it feels like everyone else is super successful and happy and I’m the only lame person on earth.
Although it’s always possible I am the lamest person on earth – but do I want my face rubbed in it? No I don’t. If I was a more sensible person I’d read a book or take the dogs for a walk. And I will. Soon.

I bet the Germans have a nifty portmanteau word for this feeling, like schadenfreude. Instead of deriving pleasure from another’s misfortune, it’s feeling guiltily miserable when someone (large numbers of people) you know and like is (are) doing well.