Unbalanced

One of the basic and fundamental laws of nature that underpins our entire relationship has gone awry.
Usually it’s Simon slathering himself in deet to no avail while clouds of biting insects ravage his body and make him look like a severe measles case while I look on with fake solicitude and unblemished skin. But somehow these holidays, it’s me being bitten by tiny ineffectual looking mini mosquitoes while he looks on, not even trying to appear sympathetic. I can only describe him as gleeful as I mournfully rub another crop of itchy bites. It’s horrible. I can only hope my public health doctor friend who warned me about dengue fever was just pulling my leg.