OK, I know it’s too soon for another scheduling email – but this is another of my favourites. I remember that frustrating drive to work very clearly.
From: Kirsty Jordan
Sent: Friday, 1 May 2015 1:22 PM
To: Wellington Anaesthesia All Staff
Subject: While the cats away…
Hi All,
This weeks schedule slightly delayed by a fire drill – a lovely chance to catch up with old friends, have a toffee pop and a breath of fresh air, but definitely an impediment to productivity. Similarly, on my way to work this morning, I was stuck behind a 2000 yo woman meandering gently Newtownwards from Karori. She was the living embodiment of the natural corollary to the phrase “live fast, die young”. She was driving a Hyundai Pony, a species of car I’ve never seen before but looked suspiciously like a Lada. It had no wing mirrors, possibly an expression of her attitude that “what’s done is done: who cares what happened in the past?”; clearly her rear view mirror was equally redundant judging by the queue of cars behind her. Not sure actually if the lack of wing mirrors was a design feature or merely a testament to her trouble with spatial awareness – she did drift around the road rather alarmingly.
Wasn’t sure if I’d manage to have anything nice to talk about this week – it had all been looking rather grim with Gallipoli, drowning refugees, the Nepal earthquake, and then the Bali 9 executions. Luckily I’ve been saved by the expulsion of the farting bachelorette. Thank God for reality TV. There is apparently a rumour on the internet that NZ is not a real place. A few months ago the only headlines you heard about us from overseas was the chocolate milk shortage. Now with Poppy and her flatus and ponytailgate, it’s only going to compound our image problem. Maybe it’s safer that way.
Andrew U heading away this weekend on his sabbatical, in his absence Indu is taking the reins as departmental paeds troubleshooter. Perhaps in anticipation of the joys ahead, Indu is off sick today. Actually she sounded pretty awful when I rang her accidentally today. You need to move into the nice snug and warm office next door to us, Indu, that will keep you safe. That and a flu shot.
Monday
Star Wars day!
Tuesday
I am DA (mixing it up this week; have grown weary of those DA/evening session combos)
Wednesday
Linda is DA. She was telling me how much she enjoys it just the other day.
My best friend is on todays theatre list. To guard her privacy, I will not reveal her identity to anyone except the anaesthetist concerned.
Thursday
Have had a surgical alert about a patient on the ENT list who will be plastered. Colin has promised not to write on it.
The sun is shining; have a lovely weekend, everyone.