A list of all the birthday presents I received this year:
1) a poster depicting different types of European cheese.
2)
3)
4)
In fact I’m not bothered by this. I am well known in the extended family as being somewhat of a Birthday grinch. And as they say, you have to give in order to receive. (Although, do they actually say that? Or have I just made it up? Well, it’s a reasonable enough attitude either way.)
Our house is filled up with so much clutter already; if there’s anything I need I can just go and buy it; and receiving gifts you don’t like is a special form of torture for all involved (hey, I never said I was a nice person). It’s enough just to be acknowledged on your birthday with (hopefully sincere) good wishes – and even too much of that can be quite trying. I worked very hard attempting to get Facebook to stop telling everyone it was my birthday every year, because it made all my (five) Facebook acquaintances feel obliged to wish me Happy Birthday. Eventually I had to resort to making my birthday February 29th, so at least it will only happen once every four years. Sadly, the first leap year I could think of was 1996, so now it seems as if I’m posing as a 23 year old (or a five year old, for you pedants). Which would certainly make me stand out in the thoroughly fact checked world of Facebook.
